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Bullying Best Exercise for Obese Children, Might Even Save Lives, Study Finds

fat kid running

Sporting Events for Obese Children Less Effective Than Bullying

In 2016, 212 pediatricians of bullied and overweight children began reporting data anonymously to a University of Berlin graduate student as part of a study on bullying’s effects on the health of overweight children. The doctors were eager for the results of the study, as they long suspected results that no one else saw coming.

Obese Kids Difficult for Doctors to Motivate; Not So For Bullies

“We’ve known for years bullies are the only ones that can make overweight kids run” said Dr. Vick Buberly of Houston, “I tell every patient to exercise and they don’t do it, but the sight of a bully and these obese kids run like gazelles.”

The study indeed validated Buberly’s hypothesis: the more an overweight kid was bullied, the more weight he lost, and vice versa.

fat teenager running from bullies

Fat teen running from bullies while eating

“Many of these fat kids never exercise, and their attempts to evade and resist bullying actually provided excellent aerobic exercise and strength training,” explained Dr. Buberly.

Many of these fat kids never exercise, and their attempts to evade and resist bullying actually provided excellent aerobic exercise and strength training

Doctors Warn Anti-Bullying Groups May Cause Deaths by Preventing Bullying Exercise

Bullying Saving Lives, Doctors Say

Physicians treating obese patients often grow frustrated treating patients who do not follow doctors’ orders about diet and exercise. We spoke with one such doctor on the condition of anonymity to learn more about this frustration.

“There were so many times I had an obese patient who kept eating ice cream and chocolate cake and wouldn’t do any of my prescribed exercises and I hoped a bully would beat the kid up a little so he’d get his fat ass in the program in hopes of having the violent bullying stopped,” our anonymous doctor said. “And then when all these anti-bullying groups came on the scene and then there was a Hollywood movie and a song on the radio about bullying and I got so angry because, as I saw it, we’re sending a message to these kids that it’s ok to be fat, we’ll protect you from bullies and we comfort them with ice cream and make them into victims.”

Other doctors we spoke with off the record concurred that anti-bullying groups were going too far with comforting and were actually a threat to obese kids.

“These parents are comforting their bullied kids with cookies and ice cream when they should be giving tough love. Look, bullying is not a good thing, but it does have good health effects,” she said.

“Bullying is not a good thing, but it does have good health effects”

“When you take away bullying, you take away the only source of exercise for many kids so obese it is life-threatening,” said Dr. Simon Vees of Berlin. “Anti-bullying campaigns backfire by making kids even fatter – I have no doubt these anti-bullying groups are causing deaths among obese kids that would have lived if they had only gotten their regular bullying exercise.”

Parents of Bullies Told to Encourage & Reward Bullying

“Be GRATEFUL My Kid Bullies Your Kid” Bumper Stickers

Parents of kids who bully are now advised to encourage the bullying by rewarding their bullies and making disparaging remarks about the fat kids to encourage more bullying.

“It’s critical to the well-being of these fat kids that the bullying is not only not stopped, but actually encouraged. We need a regular supply of healthy bullying if we’re going to solve this obesity epidemic,” said Dr. Vees.

“We need a regular supply of healthy bullying if we’re going to solve this obesity epidemic”

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